Looking Up

Posted by on Feb 15, 2016 in Write Me Sexy

Looking Up

So many times I tried to walk away from the daunting prospect of writing an erotic memoir.

But my muses were insistent.

They lured me from my yoga mat when my inner critic was quiet and my heart opened wide. They pushed me to my keyboard and gave me a glimpse of what it felt like to have a river write through me which left me trembling like a junkie wanting more.

I was hooked and they knew it.

I understand now the old stereotype of the hard-drinking writer because the most compelling material is out on our rocky precipes.  No wonder writers are notorious for knocking back a stiff one to take off the edge.

But my party girl days seem to be (mostly) behind me now and lately my drug of choice is meditation.

lookin up meditation

I’ve learned to sit and follow the flow of my breath to both harness and quiet the crashing waves of my mind.  This has helped immensely during the publication process which has been a wild ride and not always an easy one.

I had to work through my Inner Catholic Girl’s sexual shame. I had to unleash my Perfectionist who I’ve kept tethered to my yoga mat because she wreaked so much havoc in my 20’s and 30’s.  She’s unrelenting and quite honestly a bitch but I needed her for the proofread. She just about drove me crazy since I don’t think it is possible to find every single typo but she has a very high opinion of herself and had to try.

Now my focus has shifted to marketing and promotion. When my brain starts buzzing like a trapped bee after hours on the computer trying to figure out social media, I use meditation to land it on the nearest flower.

My first book is now out of my hands and out of my head.  It came through my heart and was harder than I expected but healing in a way I never anticipated.

I’m publicly launching my book at the Seattle Erotic Arts Festival on April 24, which will be a manifestation of a vision I’ve had for five years.

The cake is  baked.  Now I get to frost it.

Things are looking up.

lookin up profile for blog


  1. I can’t wait to indulge in your frosting this weekend in Seattle!

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