So Defined

Posted by on Jul 12, 2013 in Redefining Sexy

One of the purposes of this blog is to blow the lid off the definition of sexy.

This post is the first of a new series to do just that.

Defining Sexy #1:

Sexy: (adj.) used to describe someone who has mastered a skill which you aspire to be good at but are hopelessly not.

For me, today, that skill would be: splitting firewood.

I find it is so incredibly hot the way my man swings an ax and slices through a huge pine log like it was a stick of butter.  When I try, all I get is a few dents in the top of the log.

Picture

Black Boot Beauty

But I went out to the chopping block this morning more determined than ever because:

  1. I like to think of myself as a sexy mountain woman who can split her own firewood.
  2. I’ve been having lots of meltdowns and my woodpile is almost down to dirt. If I want to keep soaking, I really need to figure this out.

I put on a sexy lumberjack ensemble: Daisy Dukes that are too worn and short to be worn anywhere but the cabin; a lace-trimmed

tank top; hiking boots and leather gloves.

I threw everything I had into that ax and all I got was a ‘thunk’.  I even closed my eyes and meditated on it, imagining the energy of my entire body transferring through the ax into the wood.

Thunk.

I decided it must be a leverage thing, given that my man is about six feet tall and I’m only five.

So I went inside the cabin in search of my new boots, a gift from my friend Katherine who encourages my erotica writing yet calls me Little Peanut which is only fair since I call her Bugs.  I think she determined that I needed new pair of Come-Fuck-Me boots after reading this post.

I’ve never worn the boots outside the cabin since they are designed for seducing not hiking, but I was eager to test my leverage theory.

End result:  After about ten thunks I finally hacked one round in two. I didn’t get much wood split but I laughed a lot.

Which brings me to Defining Sexy #2:

Sexy- (adj.) used to describe someone who is willing to look ridiculous in order to get better at something they find sexy.

Sexy Prod: What skill do you find so sexy that you are willing to look ridiculous trying to master it? Tell me about it in the comments. If you don’t have one, find something. Dropping the ego and learning something new is super sexy.

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